Osama Bin Laden

BeauPro

Speaking Of Which...

Tired of the conversation at hand? Annoyed at a whole nation bringing up shit about your rule? Fed up with not having others talk about yourself? Well have no fear! There is a new style of speech that will help you talk about you with others.

Just start all your conversation changers with the words "Speaking of which" and then say something like, "I don't remember the last time I went to an Olive Garden!" Viola, you are back at the center of topic.

Drinks Don't Make You Fat!

....It is what you eat while you're intoxicated! I feel Alcohol has gotten a bad rap for being a fattening agent in our culture.

I subscribe to the theory that  if it doesn't stick to your body then it won't get you fat. So pour that Cosmopolitan, that peanut and jelly sandwich and those french fries on you.  Obviously, The Cosmo is the least fattening of the bunch. Go out there and stick it to your belly and see for yourself what is really causing the weight gain.

The Klan Kleans!

Tired of all those black smudges on your white walls/tiles/bathrooms? Well its time to employ the Ku Klux Klan. The Klan's deep hatred of black smudges will simmer that smear right off.  Made of complete organic hatred, you can be sure its safe for whitey.

Have a spot? Reach for the Klan!