25.2.09

Bromances

It's time for a talk with all the guys in the blogasphere. Don't you guys feel like anytime you're alone with someone you feel you're kinda on a date, regardless of sex/relation?

It is cause men are always on dates when they are 1-on-1 with someone. It has to do with that special part of the brain in our head, the part that wants to be impressive. It is the same reason why we light fireworks on the side of a mountain (am I right fellas? see below). This leads to a strange area, male dating. It is like "hey I want to be your friend, so lets go do something alone together!" This leads to something new, a bromance. The problem is that the guys become awkward, like on a regular date, but its more so. There is no tangible goal like a regular date, just working towards friendship.

Learn the Bromance Dating Etiquitte (BDE):
  1. Be Nice and Relaxed as possible (You're not trying to make out with this one)
  2. Have a manly form of entertainment: sports, video games and TV are good.
  3. The Search for good food or watering hole is important activity in male dating.
  4. No hugging, only fist bumps or hand shaking, if any form of greeting (depending on the situation)
  5. Talking Points: Women, Douchebags, Sports, Guns, Politics, Annoyances, Fire (in that order)
So why male dating? Why the Bromancin'? It is cause we are practicing, building up our techniques/fine tuning/learning how to blow it. We cannot escape it.

Living Extreme DIY

  • Buy some firecrackers/smoke bombs.
  • Go Skiing/Snowboarding.
  • Light them as you go down.
  • Run from authorities/avalanches.
  • Repeat.

18.2.09

How to Write a Popular Blog and Make Your Bed!

1. Find a site that will allow you to build a blog (Blogspot?)

2. Make the Blog! Design for how you want it, keep in mind what you're blogging about.

3. Start bloggin'. Write about that one time or that other time. Lie your ass off, tell people that you're starting a group that will mix the KKK and PETA together (K. PEKTAK). Maybe Just get really, really, personal, awkwardly...people will flock.

4. Network it! Tell your friends, get your mom in on it (she will probably be your only follower). Digg it, Stumble it, Graffiti it on a bus, just get creative with networking. Sign your email with a link or a message board. Be a total slut.

5. Get a web crawler. These lil guys go through your blog and make it more accepting of search engines. They cost money, but hey if that's what it takes to be the top search for "Hoses and Moses," it is worth it.

6. And if all else fails, write a blog about: how to write a famous blog. Bloggers line up for that kinda crap.

Now Learn Something Useful!

3.2.09

Proof of Life



Are you alive? Well prove that you are not a robot! (Note: this does not test against cyborgs) Get today's newspaper and take your picture with it. It is like a hostage situation, only the only hostage is your newspaper... First person to give me a better picture of themselves with a newspaper wins a chance to get internet fame!


And now my friends...