How to Write a Popular Blog and Make Your Bed!

1. Find a site that will allow you to build a blog (Blogspot?)

2. Make the Blog! Design for how you want it, keep in mind what you're blogging about.

3. Start bloggin'. Write about that one time or that other time. Lie your ass off, tell people that you're starting a group that will mix the KKK and PETA together (K. PEKTAK). Maybe Just get really, really, personal, awkwardly...people will flock.

4. Network it! Tell your friends, get your mom in on it (she will probably be your only follower). Digg it, Stumble it, Graffiti it on a bus, just get creative with networking. Sign your email with a link or a message board. Be a total slut.

5. Get a web crawler. These lil guys go through your blog and make it more accepting of search engines. They cost money, but hey if that's what it takes to be the top search for "Hoses and Moses," it is worth it.

6. And if all else fails, write a blog about: how to write a famous blog. Bloggers line up for that kinda crap.

Now Learn Something Useful!


Rachel S said...

I hate it when it takes me like a full 2 hours to make my bed because the sheets are sort of lapping up at the air in an artistic fashion with brian eno playing.

Also, I've been a total slut, but I don't think it has increased blog traffic at all.

Anonymous said...

It helps to have illusions of granduer and to think that you are a better writter than you actually are. (Worked for me!)

Limbless Jack said...

oohh yeah, grandeur! You have to be a slut thats better than everyone! forgot to mention that.