1. Find a site that will allow you to build a blog (Blogspot?)
2. Make the Blog! Design for how you want it, keep in mind what you're blogging about.
3. Start bloggin'. Write about that one time or that other time. Lie your ass off, tell people that you're starting a group that will mix the KKK and PETA together (K. PEKTAK). Maybe Just get really, really, personal, awkwardly...people will flock.
4. Network it! Tell your friends, get your mom in on it (she will probably be your only follower). Digg it, Stumble it, Graffiti it on a bus, just get creative with networking. Sign your email with a link or a message board. Be a total slut.
5. Get a web crawler. These lil guys go through your blog and make it more accepting of search engines. They cost money, but hey if that's what it takes to be the top search for "Hoses and Moses," it is worth it.
6. And if all else fails, write a blog about: how to write a famous blog. Bloggers line up for that kinda crap.
Now Learn Something Useful!