Problem Solved!

I hate pizza, I'll eat it yes, but I hate it. Pizza is everywhere and everyone eats it, they love it. One night dear reader, while wearing my doctors outfit, I realized that pizza causes cancer! Do the math, I hate it, a lot of people eat it and a lot of people get cancer, thus pizza causes cancer. Lets do the math
People = P
Pizza = p
P x p = Peepee
P + p = Cancer

So reader make the connection, do you hate something? Red capes? You may be a bull, just keep your eyes open for these disease hate connections, the life you could be saving...well in my case I was already safe, but it might be your own.
Next Week: Jack writes to celebrities, will they respond? Fireworks: why always up? Black lung or black boogers? You decide!


Bombs and Blankets

So I was thinking about chairs, mainly this one, which basically could work in any cockpit, giant robot or frying people chair. Ummm.....line? So as I was saying Drub is the word of the day, for example today I drubbed. I really have been thinking about blankets and how blankets are very useful, but how can I make money off blankets? I don't know how to sew and I have no interest in starting a sweat shop (at least not for blankets). I do know how to tell people (humans too) what they should do. So I'm gonna break it down and Pop and lock.
Number One
Blankets are warm and square (I mean that literally, but they are uncool too).
Number Two
Magic powers, that kid from peanuts knew it and so should you. From healing to taking revenge on that one annoying person at work "Ah! Blanket in my tailpipe!" The Native Americans knew the wrath of an angry blanket.
Number Three
Great for costumes, from the traditional ghost to Gypsy lady wrapped in a blanket. On a side note, some cultures use the blanket as a sexual aid...I will not go into it because my readers of of the highest class and their eye(s) will burn out of their skull upon reading that.

So if you really want to read such smut: buy my book!