The Recession and You

The Depression 2.0 is upon us and it seems no one can get a job or keep one for that matter. People are looking everywhere for extra cash and finally they turned to the web 2.0. My dearest readers have been sending in tons of letters, asking me to solve this problem and I have finally come up with a solution(2.0). A friend told me, "You can make more money by just marrying a person than working everyday of your life." T'is true, that is why I am starting a school, The Cabana Boy Institute (CBI).

As a Cabana Boy, I find that you will need Six basic things:
  1. A Pool
  2. Sun Screen
  3. Banana Hammock
  4. Aloe Vera (extra large tube)
  5. An Accent
  6. Raid
Pretty standard stuff and self explanatory. Edit: It seems people don't see the necessary applications of Raid as a pool boy. There are a ton of rodents in the area and as I always say, "Let the Raid do the touchin'."

For those female who are also hit by these rough times, get pregnant. It is the easiest way to get financially secure. I mean just look around you lately, don't you see a bunch of new babies or preggers ladies? Take a hint women.

Next Week: How do you get that women with a skimmer net and a marble bag? Also where not to spray and finally choosing the right accent for you.


Ryan Villarreal said...

Where do I sign up?

Limbless Jack said...

Send me money, that's where

Rachel S said...

WHo will impregnante me? There are a ton of rodents in the area!