Exercise and The Night Walker

Devoted fans, I would like to turn your attention to a very special guest we have dwelling on the other side of my brain. He is not much for words, we don't actually know his name, but he is known as the Night Walker. One of his favorite activities is walking at night. The Night Walker would like to explain the ways he thinks everyone should exercise, but he is a drunk so Jack will paraphrase.

...Now fill the flask with a hard liquor and wait for dark because light hurts. Go to the bars, you must walk and preferably in a bad neighborhood. Drink as much as you can until the bars close. Now get home as fast as you can without anything but your own two feet. The people you will see will defiantly keep you motivated. Keep mind that breathing is important, so do it as little as possible (always have to be prepared for an unexpected choking).

If you're not into the whole running home from bars, there is another way. Locate yourself. Then find where the Minotaur lives (he's like a mean Richard Simmons, with the same outfit). And I know what you ladies are thinking, men only face Minotaurs, what can us women folk do? Well I have the answer, just like the Minotaur's mom, Pasiphaë, you can have sex with a bull. You will need someone to build you a cow outfit. The cow outfit will work your upper body, while the bull will work your lower...consult a doctor about being mounted by a bull before you take on this endeavor...ehhh?